It’s Friday, Friday, everyone get hate on Friday!
Buff okes
I have no problem with people getting fit and strong. I run twice a week and have recently started boxing and yes, I know you’re trying to picture it and yes, I do look like a giraffe having a seizure. My goals are just to try to counteract all the drinking and smoking I do. As the saying goes, “everything in moderation”. This applies to protein shakes and lifting weights too, guys. There’s a fine line between looking toned and looking like a fucking condom full of walnuts. Actually the line isn’t fine at all – it’s glaringly obvious even to those jabbing themselves in the eyes with steroids. A good rule of thumb for all the avid gymmers out there: when your head starts to look like a grapefruit with ears atop your Hulk body, it’s too late and probably time to make manorexia your new hobby. And buff girls?! What the fuck? If you can beat me at arm wrestling you’re instantly relegated to the bottomless pit of girls I wouldn’t go near if I was wearing a hazmat suit and goggles.
The Internet
I absolutely fucking love the internet!
It’s filled with so much knowledge, so much bullshit, and so many LOLs. No one can define exactly what it’s purpose is or how it should be used… and that’s it’s beauty. I mean, last week I spent an incredible 10 minutes looking at Alpacas with ridiculous haircuts, and it genuinely made me happy. It’s been around for years and the dynamic changes almost weekly. It has created millions of jobs and has boosted business and trade in ways no one could have predicted, thanks to individual users who somehow found the skills to harness the beast for a while and use it to their advantage.
And I say a while because everything comes and goes on the internet.
Online stores, blogs, news sites, haters, porn, search engines. Everything on the internet has it’s time to shine until some other smartass figures out a way to deliver what people crave more effectively. It’s beautiful. It’s cutthroat. It’s like real life on meth. Without the internet none of us would know who the fuck Rebecca Black is. Did the creators of the internet ever see that one coming? No. It has grown so organically over the years and I can’t wait to see what comes next.
Personally, I’m rooting for Rebecca Black’s ‘Thursday’, and goat-on-cyborg spaz porn.
This type of packaging
I’m convinced this shit was designed by scientists to test human beings’ breaking points.
Packaging that hurts you physically and mentally. It slits your hands while ridding you of any confidence you may have had relating to your aptitude for practicality, leaving you with very little will to live and bloody pants. When your kitchen scissors barely scrape the surface of this plastic that was forged by Satan, one comes to a great crossroads in one’s life: Do I turn the scissors on myself and aim straight for the jugular, or do I carry on living my life sans the product buried within?
I choose death.
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Have a good weekend. x